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Growing up in the LDS church I knew very little about sex and sexuality. Basically the philosophy is "no sex before marriage" but how to reconcile and understand those crazy hormones?
What happens if you make mistakes? You talk to HF and your bishop, but how explicit do people get? Have the expectations of moral cleanliness always been exactly the same, or are they more strict now?
I did a little research and found basically no specific doctrine on this topic. The guidelines are general: don't get aroused before marriage.
Some of us need a little more guidance.
This list is for the youth in your life, but NOT YOU CLAIRE ASHCROFT, STOP READING NOW!
Dear Youth, You are Still Breaking the Law of Chastity if You…
1. Participate in activities known in the parlance of our time as “dry docking,” “Levi loving,” “body surfing” or anything resembling this activity, whether laying, sitting, or standing on your head. (No loss here. You’re better off for it. It sounds painful).
1. Participate in activities known in the parlance of our time as “dry docking,” “Levi loving,” “body surfing” or anything resembling this activity, whether laying, sitting, or standing on your head. (No loss here. You’re better off for it. It sounds painful).
2. Intentionally see a member of the opposite sex naked or partially naked. No skinny dipping, changing in the same room, streaking etc. (There goes half the fun of college).
3. Engage in any kind of sexual fluid exchange or activity that could potentially result in fluid exchange. No watching either.
4. Touch or kiss anybody sexually, including yourself. I don’t know how to kiss yourself, but just don’t do it. That kissing and touching “anywhere that isn’t covered by a bathing suit” excuse is just silly. Anywhere that isn’t covered by garments is a better line of thought, and hickeys are also bad form. (That means YOU, teenagers at amusement parks!)
5. Engage in phone sex, cyber-sex, lustfully thinking about sex or any other kind of sex. Basically, no sex for you. “In other words, as we have frequently said, there should be total chastity of men and women before marriage and total fidelity in marriage.”[i]
[i] Spencer W. Kimball, ‘The Time to Labor Is Now,” Ensign, November 1975, 7.
[i] Spencer W. Kimball, ‘The Time to Labor Is Now,” Ensign, November 1975, 7.
And for Celia: A Ho Bath is not some crazy Asian thing. A Ho Bath is a sponge bath wherein you only wash the "most important parts" or the parts necessary for being a ho.
You KNOW you've taken one, you probably just didn't know what they were called. Now you know, you're welcome.
13 comments:
My how informative! I wish that you would have hosted the firesides of my youth. You failed to mention "floating" which I have been told by different provo sources is all the rage. But the Hobath was entirely new to me- or was the small print not intended for me?
Lindsay(I am adrianne's sister, who is a friend of Paige.)
WHOA! Very informative. And I really want to know what floating is. I am so out of the loop.
We like to #1 fauxing. Not that I ever did it.
Finally! I have been wondering about ho baths for SO long. I have a feeling this post is going to get published in the New Era.
This post may be informative but not at all helpful for your demographic. And what does a ho bath have to do with the law of chastity?
I always just heard pits and ass bath.
You do know that you are going to be made the YW President now right? Our youth need more people who will tell them straight! Good luck with the new calling!
Cute pregnant tummy! Hey, now you're ready for "the talk" you'll someday have with Mimi.
But is Brown Sugar going to tell us about floating? Thanks for the clarification on the Ho Bath. Did you know I didn't figure out what bidets were for until I got married? Dummy.
Thank you! I think I will slip this under my 13 yr old daughters door and run like the wind! Things need to be siad plain and simple and in words that kids understand. It needs to be black and white. I agree with you being called to be YW pres. Is that the phone ringing right now???
I have to say I've been thinking about this post and find it titillating. I'm going to try out all those positions tonight. Fluid exchange, fun.
Ew, Paige, vomit!
I hope your birth control fails.
our stake prez used to take all the youth in our ward into a big room once a year and lock out all other adults so he could have The Chastity Talk with us as a group In No Uncertain Terms. all other adults were banished so we kids would not hold back our questions. it was the bitchinest sunday school of every year.
also please raise your hand if you have seen the statement issued in 1982 by president benson and the 12 about what business he thought was too naughty even for married folks.
also i would like to know where your stretchmarks are in that photo. what kind of pregnant person were you?
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