9/18/14

How We Feel About Parenting

Baby Bettylou week 1

9/11/14

Here Comes My Baby!

After about a month of labor our sweet baby girl was born on Tuesday 9/9/14 at 5:11am.

The doctor did that horrible torture procedure that hurts like hell but encourages all of my babies to come within 24 hours on Monday morning.  I spent the day in about the same amount of pain as normal and then at about 11 Hush and I went for a walk.  By the time we got home I was in screaming pain but, having been here three time before I did not want to go into the hospital just to be told "Yes, you're dilating, but you're not progressing so good luck see ya later." 
Seasoned at worried runs to the hospital with my body who cried wolf, Hush took out the trash and changed the laundry not knowing that I was crying in pain.  But when he got behind the wheel and found me cursing and praying and begging for mercy, he drove like a bat out of hell to the hospital.  It takes an hour to get there, he made it in 25 minutes flat.  Cat Stevens made the time go quickly, especially "Here Comes My Baby."
When I got inside they checked me (I was a 6) hooked me up to an IV and started the epidural process within 10 minutes of arrival.  Epidurals are the scariest part for me.  They seem so risky and outrageous, but they're the only way to go. I prefer to get narcotics or something to calm me down like stadol or versed, but apparently there wasn't time.  I was shaking violently.
Once the epidural was in my heart rate zoomed down and I started to faint, then zoomed up really high. All of the sudden twelve people in scrubs burst into the room and said something about my baby being mad, did some stuff to fix the problem and then left again.  It was confusing and exciting.

After that we had three hours of calm, other than checks and water breaking.  At about 4am the nurse said I was fully dilated and called my doctor who came around 4:45. My dear friend Jessica came right before then, my other birth party people slept right through.  But Hush and Jess were there so it was ok. Hush held my leg and didn't look.  Jess took pictures.

Then I pushed that baby out in two minutes cause I'm a champ.
When she was born she needed about 45 minutes of special care because she had swallowed a lot of fluids. It was scary mostly because neither hush nor I were really sure what was going on and it seemed pretty invasive.  I had some stuff that needed attention too. But soon we were all able to bond together.  She weighed 7lbs 13oz and was 20inches long.
Hush's sister Kim was watching the three big kids so once they transfered me he went home to relieve her and get the kids to their schools.  

That afternoon Hush brought all the minions to the hospital and there was a great meeting of the children.  That afternoon was a rotating door of visitors that I was so grateful to have.



Then came the great debate about names.  By 11am I had received over 300 texts on a sisters and parent group text message.  It was epic.  

On Facebook and Instagram I had about 150 name suggestions.  I had not anticipated the interest and support.  It took us three days and much discussion to finally arrive at the exact name Hush and I been leaning toward since May.
So here she is, our perfect little sweetheart:
Betty Ophelia B.

I told you I was going to name her Bob!






Let's Do This Thing Already!

My toes are ready:
Painstakingly painted with shellac so they're not going anywhere. You gotta go to my new nail girl.

My tummy is ready:
37 weeks
38 weeks

Rebekah is ready:
At the Ogden Temple open house with two non-members.  Thanks to Rebekah who encouraged this trip.  I'm so impressed with her fearless desire to know the culture of where she currently lives and doesn't shy away from Mormon things though they can be overwhelming.   She's such a supportive open minded friend.  

Silas is ready:
Big brother on deck.
This silly boy will do anything for laughs. Today he paraded around in a tutu when the Primary presidency came over, just to make them giggle.
Sisi's first day at preschool. Loves it. Age 4 1/2

Mimi is ready:
I got the best if both worlds with this girl. She loves dressing fancy AND getting dirty.  We found a construction gravel supply (no trespassing) and went diving through the pebbles.  The kids call it Sandyland.  We may get arrested someday.
Age 7 1/2
Mimi's been giving us hell these last few nights as she transitions back into school.  The other day she wanted to watch a show before bed and in order to rush her through it Hush set up three iPads at different places in the episode and allowed them to run for ten minutes concurrently. Efficient tv watching.

Miranda at her namesake play The Tempest.  I'm always amazed at how live theater can make sense to even the smallest children.  Kids loved it.

Jude is ready:
We went to This Is The Place on Labor Day.  It's more than just a monument now; there's a whole town set up to show you how the new settlers to Utah lived.  It's a great place to visit and they have cool crafts and Native American dance shows, pony rides and ice cream. Great place to send kids with grandparents (or with their anachronistic stepfather who likewise loved it).
Doing perler beads with Aidan.  Both of these boys have remarkable attention spans for small motor skills work.
The children are allowed to pick out their own Halloween costume this year rather than doing a group theme.  Jude, 6, has selected this butch motorcycle dude and it delights my soul.
Doing pre-baby henna on all of our tummies. 

Hush is ready:
Everybody learning how to milk, vaguely aware of how much this type of activity is shortly going to be part of their lives.
At the fun center which has been my respite in the last few weeks. Pass of all passes render the whole joint (all rides and laser tag and golf) free! I sit, they play.  And finally Hush was able to come take the kids on the adult must accompany rides.
Our paltry outdoorsy nature experience this summer.  We couldn't rock climb nor hike at all because of my condition and our moving chaos.  We are ready to be back to our normal activities and we are 
READY FOR THIS BABY!










8/16/14

Birth Party Plan

In preparation for the birth of my fourth minion I’ve been rereading The Red Tent by Anita Diamant.  Like so many books for and about women, labor and birth are focal points.  The births in The Red Tent are attended by sisters.  Men wait outside nervously.  Hush is trying to negotiate his way out of the delivery room, but there is no such luck for modern husbands. 

At one point in the book a mother is in a distant land and has gone into labor far from her sisters but finds that “The cries of a laboring mother bring out other women like geese responding to the call of a leader in flight.”  And delivering she “pushed for long hours, supported by women who became her sisters, at least for that day.”

I am terrified to have a baby without my Greenbomb sisters.Sorority

This is our sorority in 2011 (missing Val, Alina and Aubrey) doing what we do best: eating and loving up some babies (Silas and Otto).

I have some stand-ins who have kindly accepted the invitation to be my birth party.  This is how to have a birth party ala Greenbomb.

Step one:  Have your phone on.  You will be texted and expected when the mother is officially checked in and dilated to a 3.  Get there as soon as you can, but not neglecting this golden opportunity to look both cuter and less gigantic than the laboring sweaty mother.

OBirth

Celia, Paige and me attending Otto’s birth.  Notice how we are all dolled up, but please ignore my awkward posing and facial expressions.  But damn I’m skinny!  Must have been mid-divorce.

Step two:  You are on outside world contact duty.  Ignore all “no cell phones” rules.  Specifically, please continuously update my sisters about my progress/mood/everything they’re missing.  Cattiness is fine.  Please report back all the funny things they say. The dad is responsible for the Baby is Here phone calls, which must be done in age order, Jim to Camille. Ebirth1

Paige on phones.  Sylvie’s birth I think.

Step three:  Although let’s face it, he has much less experience than you do, you are in charge of making the dad feel important and relevant.  He needs to hear and interact with the doctors because he can make medical decisions for me while I’m out of it.  Make sure he has treats and cell phone juice, please.  He is both the cause of this ordeal AND the one person who can make the mother feel calm.  Make sure he’s always in the face position of the mother, like Mark here:

Ebirth

E’s friend Lindsay took Celia’s place for Sylvie’s birth.

Step four:  MAKE ME LOOK GOOD.  You are in charge of making sure my hair doesn’t look more whacked out than it usually does (braids are good).  Take photos from flattering angles.  Make sure I have sufficient make-up on.  I’m going to have to look at these pictures for the rest of my life and if I look terrible in them that’s on you, team.  I’m pushing a baby out, I have other crap to worry about.  Also I’ll likely be dancing with sugar plums on Stadol. 

Ebirth2

This might be my favorite picture of Ellie ever.

JBirth

Paige making my hair tidy.  I started to faint right after this picture, but before I blacked out Celia blended the powder on my nose.

Jbirth3

Jude’s birth.  Good photo angle.

Sbirth

Silas’ birth.  Makeup application by Paige.

Step five: YOU ARE THE FUN.  Births can be interminable (not mine, they take like three hours) so it’s your job to distract and entertain.  Go through all of the drawers and find the good loot and try it all on.  Bring US Weekly and gossip and baby name books.  The more talking the less I am aware of the pain.  I’ll scream if I need medical attention.  “A woman in birth is at once her most powerful and her most vulnerable.” –Marcie Macari

Jbirth4

Paige “checking” my dilation.

Sbirth1

Celia and Paige telling me all about Elin’s divorce from Tiger Woods.  Relevant at the time.

Step six:  Help me push out that baby.  When the doctors come in and the transformer bed is all set up your position is holding knees and talking me through the scary part.  Hush will be my focal point.  Just FYI, I’ve never taken any birth classes and don’t know a thing about breathing because I believe in highly medicated childbirth.  If the meds don’t work you have to teach me what to do, like what Celia did during my unmedicated transition with Jude.   You can look down from that position, but no looking up from the foot of the bed or I may kick you.  Prevent husband from looking, he just doesn’t need to be scarred in that way. 

JBirth5

This is Celia during the serious part.

Sbirth2

And here’s Celia cracking herself up during the serious part.  Click through to Silas’ birth story to see the video Paige took of Celia while I was pushing out a freaking kid.  Oh and the video at the bottom of Mimi meeting Si is to die for.

Step seven:  You’re in charge of making sure nothing inappropriate is put on film.  All modesty is out the window during labor so if I forget to cover myself up, help a girl out please.  You’re also in charge of making sure the important moments are on film (mostly pictures of Hush and his new baby girl.)

JBirth1

Paige’s hand covering my nakedness while holding newborn Jude.  Celia blogged the birth on my page for me.

Step eight:  You have every right to cuddle the new baby you helped bring into the world!  And your naming opinions will be heard.  Paige helped name Mimi, Celia suggested Silas. 

JBirth2

All the pregnancy books talk about birth plans but this is what a birth plan looks like to me.  Many thanks to my sisters for teaching me all about how to make childbirth days the best days of my life; thanks in advance to my family and friends who have agreed to come to this birth.  I am so so very fortunate that I get to go through the exquisite torture of childbirth.  I’m even more thankful I get to experience it at a time when medicine and doctors make it less risky and terrifying.  At 36.5 weeks now I can safely say that I’m so uncomfortable that I wouldn’t mind if I had to sneeze this child out of my nostril as long as it comes out soon and perfect. 

And the greatest thanks, of course, to Hush for picking me to have his baby.

Ok, GO TEAM!

8/10/14

Indiana Jude

A few weeks back Hush and I introduced the children to Indiana Jones.  As is right and proper, they were instantly enamored.  During the horrible dinner scene in Temple of Doom Hush filmed us watching and being horrified by the disgusting dishes they served.  Silas' reactions were my favorite, "They're eating 'nakes!"







So for Jude's 6th birthday he requested an Indiana Jones party.  We happened to be in Dville a week before his birthday and all the cousins were around so Pam and I tee'd up the Indiana Jones themed dinner and surprised Jude with all of the gag-inducing things we could imagine.



Kool-aid with Marshmallows and chocolate chips


Silas was particularly creeped out by this.


Spiral noodles cooked in red food coloring with a monkey mask.








Indiana Jones needs a real whip, thanks Grandma Pamma!


Jude and Griffin


Mark and Baby Abe



The cousins then went on a treasure hunt and smashed a monkey pinata.  It was a party success!

For Jude's actual birthday we were back in Utah so we met our Utah cousins at the Fun Center.  (Kara, did you get any pictures of all the kids together?  I took a total of three pictures bc I was too busy not having a baby at the fun center.)


Silas' scared face.


And for his special birthday treat Jude requested Root beer floats and a man outing with Hush.  They went bowling and had a grand old time.