Westerly Welaxation

June and July are good months to take up residence at Pam's house.  The pool is warm, the beds are cozy and the food is gratis.  It's pretty much bliss, but for the fact that Hush has something called a  job that apparently he has to attend and he therefore must stay in Utah.  After 30 weeks of hard pregnancy, a stay at the Mothership is downright indulgent: my mother does the dishes and makes any dinner we request!  That, to any mother, is the vacation we all dream of having.  Add that to the constant entertainment of my children by their cousins and the result is I finally got sufficient rest that my body didn't hurt anymore.  Miraculous!  There were about five pain free days!

One of our adventures was a practice session on the ice.  Jude is interested in hockey and we both wanted to see if it's a sport we could manage.  Ms Jackie's kids were so patient getting him all armored and suited up, but Jude needs some practice on hockey skates before he's ready.  Also, holy moly hockey moms are hardcore.  There's so much gear! I don't know how they can keep it all straight and fitting and all that maintenance. 

Silas is acting as my sewing dummy in this picture.  When my mother and I are together we often do sewing projects.  She's a master seamstress and I have ideas that she thinks will never work.  We usually come up with something fabulous.

My hair turned teal.  I like it!  I'm excited to see what colors it gradually fades into while I swim all summer.  What's funny is that most of my family didn't even notice.  They're used to the changes.  

Mimi and Silas having a hug-a-war. (Ages 7 and 4). I hardly saw Mimi the whole time we were there because she was too occupied with cousins.  Houdini also saw the children twice while we were in town.

Dville in summer means Giants.  My mother is a huge fan.  She watches every single game, shouts at the screen loud enough to wake the neighbors, and mourns every time they lose.  Not only that, her phone alerts the whole house to every play with a cacophonous chime.  Every day is Giants day, even if they are losing.  Since I spent most evenings on the couch, I become a defacto fan. It's hard not to get caught up in Pam's contagious enthusiasm (and requisite disappointment).  My sister Val showed up at the Giants game a few days before the fourth to surprise my mother.  

Sometimes when you're talking on the phone with your long distance husband you find yourself doodling a fairly poor rendition of the Death Star, assuming the henna wouldn't stay long.  It did. My doctor appreciated it at our appointment.

One cousin adventure was the county fair.  Is forgotten how fun the fair is.  We did the animals, raced RC cars, ate some over priced food, danced with a Doo Wop band to Barbara Ann, and rode some rides.  Did not get a picture of the whole group, but we had two of Celia's kids, one of Paige's, three of mine, my BFF Ashley's two, and my sister Val.  

Ashley, Brynn and Si racing.  You had to pass a quiz on Solar Energy to race the cars.  I am now an expert on solar energy.

After three long weeks of recovering from having a family Hush arrived on the morning of the fourth!  Everybody needed to miss each other for a while.  It was a joyous reunion and he made it in plenty of time for the annual baseball game.  He made us proud.

Saturday morning we hit Capitola with Camille and Alex.  I've been dying to teach Hush how to surf, but being that I can't lay on my stomach I had to pass the honor off on Cam and Alex who have been surfing weekly for a few months.  I could hardly contain my jealousy.

I tried to get them to let me paddle on my back, but there was no wetsuit that could contain my porpoise. 

This is what nearly 8 months pregnant looks like. Apparently I feel much larger than I look.

And this is our surf crew (two on the right, I think. They all look exactly the same to me when they're in the water.)

Ok, I'm running out of steam on this post. More pictures to come.

Three in Three Years

It's all finally paying off.

Remember that time I had three kids in three years and it was the most exhausting demanding intense parenting experience ever?

Well times have changed.

I remember getting that third unexpected positive pregnancy test and thinking, "Oh, this is going to be impossible."  Mimi was 2 1/2 when Silas was born, Jude was 16 months.  Three under three. Jude could hardly walk. Mimi had nothing resembling judgment.  Everybody had car seats, nobody could dress themselves, nobody could feed themselves.

As soon as Si was born I instituted the rule Only Two People Crying at Once and for the most part, they cooperated.  They learned that their needs are important, but not necessarily going to be met at once.  

Because they were raised as a pack my children learned to either solve their problems themselves, help each other, or wait.  They learned independence, helpfulness and evaluative skills.  It was me and the three which made for a sink or swim situation.  They swam.

And now I am reaping the rewards.

For all the times I ran in and out of the house collecting shoes, I get to enjoy putting all three of them out to pasture in the backyard knowing they have playmates.

For every seatbelt I buckled, I now have kids who just climb right in the car and buckle their own seatbelts.

Where I used to chase babies saving them from imminent drowning, I now lounge and watch as they make up games in the pool.

At the park where I used to stand for hours lifting them in and out of baby swings, I get to watch as they push each other on the swings and pump themselves.

For every kiddie singing class I went to, I am now rewarded when they request Johnny Cash, Green Day, and The Four Seasons and then sing every word at top volume.

For every sleep interruption they caused, I am now encouraged to take naps (so they can have screen time and help themselves to food.)

My job is just not that labor intensive anymore.

The best part about this stage is their genuine affection for each other.  I do not know how this really came about.  Perhaps it's the old adage, "You love the ones you serve." If I'm unavailable they have to help each other.  Mimi can reach cereal bowls.  Jude can make toys and video games work.  Silas can fetch things and doesn't mind being bossed around.  They're a team.

Their sense of security within their group I think has promoted their fearlessness.  Mimi is bold as a puppy and Jude, seeing her, is a lot more brave than he would be if he were first child.  Silas sees the others and wants a piece of the action.  They're not wimps.

They can also dress themselves, sort of.  Well, considering their primary fashion example, I shouldn't be surprised they come downstairs needing a little bit of outfit editing.

The last year has mellowed my minions.  They act as though they feel stable and well balanced.  They love their school, their home, their new dad, their friends, their church and their Salt Lake life.  They feel normal and act self confident. 

This is my last summer with my little triumvirate, but I think they are ready to focus their love on a tiny baby.  

Not the Smartest Person in the Room

Am I the only person who thinks the Kate Kelly situation has been handled appropriately?  I have feelings and I have a forum. So here we go.

What happens when you belong to an organization that by belonging to it asserts your tendency toward belief that it is led by God, and then you have the audacity to not only assert your disbelief in it's divine leadership but also encourage and rally others into disbelief in an organized and public fashion?

You, my friend, have started a faction.  Kate Kelly's mission to ordain women indicates that she does not believe in the fundamental tenants of the religion: that it is led by God. And if God says that men hold the priesthood, then that is what happens.  As an LDS feminist I think calling Kate Kelly a "women's rights activist" is outrageous.  The "right" she is arguing for is irrelevant; she could be lobbying for lowering the age to get a temple recommend or demanding that we all wear green on Thursdays and it would still be attempting to assert her personal revelation above the channels that are in place in this organization.

There is plenty of room for doubt.  One might even oppose.  But to organize a contrary group within the LDS religion is essentially saying, "I don't support this and I don't think God knows what He's doing."  Even I, with my confusion about gay issues in the gospel, know enough to be aware that I don't know everything.  If Kate Kelly loves this religion so much why fight against it's organization? Why skip a meeting called specifically to engage with you about your beliefs?  It seems as though Kate's own agenda is far more important to her than her membership in the LDS church.  And with that said, why not just quit?  Or go start your own church where people can make up the rules as they go along?  What type of person is she that she would feel the need to set herself up as the posterchild of supposed "oppression"?  

The Mormon Moment may be over, and to that I say good.  It's not a religion for the feignt of heart and we have lived through decades of bad press.  We can handle it and we don't attempt to explain why God does what He does.  The church doesn't excommunicate as punishment, they do it to relieve the individual of their responsibilities and free them from the promises they've made but are choosing not to keep.  And of course, if Kate Kelly decides that she both believes in and supports the organization of the religion, she can try again. And again. And again. And we, even I, would have to accept her back into our congregation and forget her disobedient past.

One has to wonder what sort of experiences or mental state one would have to be in to essentially say "I'm smarter than the leaders of this church and God is making a huge mistake by not doing what I think is the right thing to do."

Ugh, the whole thing just smacks of pride and disrespect.  You want to lead? Go find people who need your leadership.  I'm cool with those ordained dudes who speak to God and I'm smart enough to know I'm not the smartest person in the room.

Instagram Reblog Week 2

Life must be documented! Instagrams from June 2014.

How's that Baby Cooking?

So I think I'm about 7 months pregnant with this little baby number 4.  We are in Danville visiting my parents.  Pam is taking care of me and my kids, thus cutting my workload in half. Hush and I were supposed to be galavanting through Europe right now but we had to postpone our trip because I can't walk. Also he has something called a job that he can't ditch right now.  We all miss him terribly but he's coming out here soon.  In the meantime he is enjoying some much needed man time.

The children and I are playing and waiting for our new little sister.  I've never had a baby when my other children were old enough to understand vaguely what was happening and being pregnant with three children has been a totally different experience.

First of all, I travel in a cloud.  A fog of children.  Wherever I go, every way I turn, I nearly trip over somebody short.  So many little feet! So many arms!  With my expanding size I feel very claustrophobic most of the time.  It's good and bad because when we're out I know that if I can feel them touching me or if I stumble over them they are safe.  

My belly is a magnet for them and I love it.  I'm currently experiencing that amazing heaviness below my belly button and sometimes I hold it up with my hands when I'm having a hard time walking.  The children are attune to when I'm struggling and they often try to help carry the baby for me.  "I hold the baby mama.  I help you"  they say as they push up on my tummy. 

Silas has even taken the time to grow a sympathy belly.  I can see why they want to touch my tummy all the time -- I want to touch their chubby tummies too!

As far as symptoms, my favorite inflammation of the pelvis joint that had receded somewhat has returned with a vengeance.  Maybe it's in honor of the World Cup, my soccer player kicked crotch.  I have to lay down for every hour that I'm up, 1:1.  When I'm laying down this little wiggly baby likes to flip around, even laying transverse for a whole day.  That was uncomfortable.  Also I pretty much can't walk.  C'mon body.  You're better than this.

I had problems with Silas rolling the wrong way every day to the point where my md had to do a version (baby rolling at the doctor's office or hospital).  I'm usually able to roll them inside the womb and I can identify fairly well how they're laying by where they kick.  For the last few days this baby has been giving my intestines an internal massage, which means she's currently breech.  Being 29 weeks I should have enough time to flip her around, but of course I have all these umbilical cord phobias.  

Physically uncomfortable though I am, I have little Si who just cannot give the baby enough love.  He snuggles my tummy and lays on it and talks to the baby and kisses it.  The other kids love to touch me and kiss me, but Silas is particularly funny because when he talks to me he puts one hand on either side of my belly like he's holding my face in his hands.  Lots of kisses and pats.  He thinks it's his own personal pillow, which tight and firm as my belly has gotten can be awkward.  

Sneezing is a no. Rolling over, boo.  Moving quickly is a thing of the past.  I think I'll spend the next few months bobbing up and down in the pool.

Or maybe I'll just invest in this: